Thank you for agreeing to hike 8 miles with me this Saturday; for waking up early to greet the day, chowing down on hippie breakfast wraps with names like "Hummus Yummus" and so openly revealing your trials of the past few months. Your authenticity was not only truly appreciated but deeply heard and recognized. "I understand feeling as small and as insignificant as humanly possible. And how it can actually ache in places you didn't know you had inside you..."
I love that you pointed to a succulent on the Pacific Coast hillside during our hike and said "In my next life, I want to come back as that plant...to be here everyday, just taking it all in." It reminded me of the book Succulent Wild Woman by SARK, in which the author details the many ways in which "succulence is power", especially in women. She discusses the beauty in feeding our souls from within, much like how a succulent plant stores its nutrients and is able to nourish itself even during dry times. What a beautiful, symbolic moment to witness. "So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers."
If you can, try and remember the story about Jarvis Jay Masters, an inmate on death row at San Quentin State Prison, from his book Finding Freedom: Writings from Death Row. To summarize again, one afternoon while out in the rec yard a fellow inmate picked up a rock to throw at a seagull who had begun paddling around in a puddle left behind from the previous evening's rainstorm. Jarvis reached out immediately to stop the inmate from throwing the rock, which naturally created a hostile stir amongst the group.
When asked why he made the move to stop the action he simply said, "Because that bird has my wings." Instant peace and understanding settled on the group.
Keeping filling up your love tank with small moments of gratitude, kindness and forgiveness. Feed your soul by surrounding yourself with folks who make you feel good; surround yourself with beauty and authenticity. Keep trusting the process and allowing pieces of your soul to return to you at a pace that feels right for you. Keep adventuring, exploring and occasionally shakin that booty on the dance floor like you did Saturday night (holy gosh lady, you can for REALS dance!!). Lift your face to the sunshine and allow the rain to cleanse, refresh, renew. Rain or shine, every day is a new day.
Keep greeting each day by listening to your spirit voice (I'm convinced ours attend the same life church, now that I've seen you dance) and by quieting your ego. When you hear the difference between them, life will never be the same again.
When you're ready, you'll fly again my sweet, succulent girl...
...and the West Coast will be excitedly awaiting your return :)